I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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