I just saw a hot homeless man
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
