ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Life is so much better after having sex.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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