We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
