the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize