It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
