i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
