If that was your dad, he is hot
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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