Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize