Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
