just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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