"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
