He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
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