I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
