she looked like the bat from fern gully.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
