I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Acid is not a monday night drug
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize