you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I just found puke in my bra..
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
