I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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