At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
