Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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