So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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