new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
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