There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Randomize
