There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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