a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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