My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
