he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Randomize
