i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
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Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
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im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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