I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
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