R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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