You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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