Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
