oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
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