So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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