so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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