My underwear smells like fireworks.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You brought string cheese to the strip club
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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