How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
