i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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