All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Randomize
