I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
How's work?
Spinning.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
