there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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