My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Randomize
