Walk of Shame. In a state park.
she told me i tasted like america
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
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