Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
