You were right. It hurts to walk today.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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