quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
