So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
it's like iHOP with fire
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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