I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
