I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
