its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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