Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
